Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Mark Droste - Monster - Critique

video

Hey,

That looks pretty cool already!

Quick notes on the visuals, it would be good to add a frame counter (I will use the quicktime counter starting at 0). I would also hide the locators and the grid, plus expand the camera framing, so it's more widescreen and pulled away from the creature. Right now it feels a bit crammed.

Animation wise, it's cool! There are just a few little moments where it feels too fast and other details which would need tweaking:

- x6 the head seems to be going through the screen right leg

- look at the screen right tip of the leg, from x6 to 11 it shoots out and then kinda rests in that position. I would have it settle a bit more

- there's a weird isolated chest rotation from x62 to x74ish, leading into that leg move. The isolation is accentuated by the fact that the head is also very locked

- x70 the front right arm shoots up to x74. It's a bit too fast, so the weight is missing, it also stops a bit too quickly. You want to give that creature as much weight as you can.

- x106 to 107 there's a weird chest pop, same from x117 to 118; you might be able to fix it by moving the chest a bit more screen right and by involving the hips a bit more. The chest up move feels very isolated.

- The leg slip at x162 is also too isolated until x164, then there's a sticky frame to 165, and only after that the body reacts. Make sure the head doesn't snap up from x165 to 166. Quick moves like that over one frame also take away from the weight. Same goes for the hip move up on x170 and on; and the back leg slip at x175 and on.

- The head slam on the ground could also be a tiny bit slower and a bounce to that head would be good. The head just drops and then rests on the ground.

Hope that helps!
Cheers
JD

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Saberi Knakon - Dog - Critique

video

I would have to have a full orthographic front and side view, because I feels like your paws and having a little pause after they go back and before the lift off. I would add a little tail wiggle at the beginning too. The snout move is super cute but technically it feels a bit too separated from the head. Looking at x81 he looks like he got punched! HAHAHA! So reduce the snout rotating a bit a bit and add a bit of head rotation, that way visually you end up with the same pose and silhouette (in terms of how far screen right it goes), but the the snout is more attached to the head (if that makes sense).
Last thing are his eyes. The first eye blink feels to mechanical and a tiny bit too fast. I would add a frame or two of ease out when the lids go down and ease in when they go up. The second blink at the end needs the same ease out and they open too quickly too, add two frames of opening (maybe one, but try two first) and then one more frame of ease out.
The eye darts are a bit funky too. The pupil pose on x25 is too far screen right, you can barely see the black part of the pupil. Bring it more screen left. That way the dart from x25 to 26 won't be as a big and fast. Right now it's so big that you'd have to add a blink. They eye move screen left from x55 to 77 is too slow. That's more of a I'm-on-drugs move or spaced out. Break it up with eye darts. You can still travel that distance in total, but lock the eyes, then dart over a bit to the left, then pause and lock again, then dart again, etc.
Watch out for geometry intersections on x77 with his lids.

Super super cute, love it!

Cheers
JD

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Alon Helman - Spidey - Critique

video

Hey,

If possible, could you include a frame counter? I'm going to use the quicktime one which starts at x0.

Overall it's already looking great, I like your timing! Few things I'd look out for as you move on:

- the hand on the window frame starting around x46 to 75 is super locked. Especially when he gets up, you'll have to move the wrist with it.

- when he gets up during the x60 area, you could move the screen arm up a little bit. I know he's bored/annoyed, but right now that arm is just stiffly hanging down. So either have it swing loosely or bring it up into another pose.

- the body rotation around x55 is a bit simple, it looks like it's just rotating in one axis towards us, you could make that move a bit more complex

- watch the silhouette of the screen right leg at x69. I would make sure that you can see more of the thigh. If you squint, it looks like he has a short leg. The knee also rotates very quickly around as that foot moves and at x71 that leg looks broken, with the knee to the left and the foot almost horizontal. Watch that whole transition

- you could bring up the screen left arm up a bit at x75 for a clearer silhouette

- the head could also lean a bit to the right at x75, so it's leading the action a bit. Right now the head is mostly vertical throughout the clip

- around x83, wonder if you could scootch Spidey more screen right, so that you don't hide his screen left hand behind the body. Kinda works though, since the arm is clean silhouette wise, but just give it a try to see how it looks like.

- I would lower the hand around x83, down and screen left, so it's not so overlapping with the right leg

- silhouette on x95 is a bit muddled in terms of right arm and body and left leg. A clearer silhouette would be good.

- and if you move the body more screen right, looking at x103, you could also get a nicer silhouette for his left arm. Right now on that frame there's just the upper arm, would be cool to see the forearm as well

- when the foot goes down from x85 to 90 it's a bit linear, there's no arc and the foot pose doesn't change. I would end up in a different pose so that from x100 to 139, the shin is not so centered with the foot (visually). You could rotate the foot more to the left (hope that makes sense)

Cute rig! :)

Cheers
JD

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Jaewon Rho - And free - Feedback

video

Hey,

alright! Getting better though, I like the changes so far! The guy is definitely better, the tie moment and how he grabs the chair is good and I like that he turns her around now. I would continue with that and start adding more breakdowns and more facial work for him.

The woman still feels fairly similar. I would concentrate now on the beginning up to x250. What you want to establish now is more visual contrast between the two characters. Having him be tense and feeling how he's bubbling up inside yet trying to keep it together is one side. The woman, and given the audio as well, would be more alive, perky, with more body movement as she's mocking the man. That way visually you have one character moving a lot versus the other character not moving that much.

Then, when the guy grabs the chair and turns her around it's a reversal of that energy, where she gets very tense and afraid and not moving, and him getting into her face and more agitated.

So with her, think this approach:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=piimPHFFqtA#t=2m03s

the movements would be slower of course, but you can get a lot of her personality through her head movements. That and eye rolls, closed eyes, high eyebrows, etc. Keep the actions that you have with her arms, just give her more attitude.

But for the guy, keep going with more breakdowns, look for arcs, overlapping actions (like during the tie adjustment so that you involve his shoulders as well) and I'll get into the nitty gritty.

Cheers
JD

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Jessica Gamio - Check out - Feedback

video

Hey,

I think that's work pretty well! About the individual shots, here my thoughts:

Shot 1, with the title at the top, works. All I would tweak is the camera a bit, so that instead of mostly rotating down to keep the guy in frame, you add more of a translate down, so it's not such a security camera/birds-eye view shot. Imagine a camera on a crane and then they lower the crane.

Afterward it gets a bit tricky because you're breaking the 180 rule a lot. Look at shot 1, he's looking left to right, then shot two, it's a right to left composition. I know where are looking over his shoulder, but imagine you'd horizontally flop the image, you'd get the same thing, but the eye direction would be correct.

At the end of shot two, he turns his head and we are left with a right to left direction (looking at your current shot),

then shot 3 has left to right again.

From shot 3 to 4 is good because you're keeping the right to left movement.

So just be mindful of how you position your camera and the character for future shots.

Hope that helps!
Cheers

JD