Monday, April 30, 2012

Jihwan Jung - Jerry - Critique

video

Looking good!

Here my thoughts:

- on the first "Oh Jerry", I'd bring up the shoulders and lower them on "Jerry", so it's like a sigh almost; right now the shoulders are pretty dead
- same on "Oh God", right before the "Oh" she inhales, so you could show that in the chest and shoulders
- then after "God" bring the shoulders down, so it's overall drooped


- by having them down, you can bring them up once she picks up the 2nd phone, making her more alert and perky; that will give you more visual contrast in the poses and body emotion

- I would also tilt her head more to the side, so she has visually more trouble keeping her body straight, she looks more tired/defeated/sad



- again, that will provide contrast for the very end, when her head is straight and her body is straight

Hope that helps!
JD

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Jero Maggi - Sit Down - Critique

video

Yep, this looks a lot better, nicely done!

I got some picky notes and I would starting thinking about your next exercise. Do you have a preference and what you would like to do? I'd recommend a jump at this point, but if you prefer something else, let me know!

Okay:
- the arm pose from x0 to 22 still feels a bit forced; a big factor are the hand poses, which don't feel natural:



The outstretched fingers and the vertical rotation feel force. I'd look into poses like these:



So for your SL one it would be something like the red circled one, silhouette wise. The SR one wouldn't be so flat towards us and not have the wrist so vertical, it would follow the forearm a bit more:



- watch out that your hand is not locked in space, like after x15, which gives it an IK feel



- watch out that the pupils are visible and not disappearing around x26 and or getting into a cross-eyed pose



- the SL hand is drifting up his thigh from x57 to 73; I'd stabilize it and give it a more solid contact with the leg

- when he sits down, the pelvis kinda sinks into the chair from x50 to 54. It's good that it's not super sharp, but this feels a bit too soft and drifty. I know it's minor, but I would have only one or two frames of cushioning, but at a little overlap in the head on the frame of impact, so that the head rotates down a bit, showing us how the sitting stops the root but the momentum and "shockwave" travels to his head where the head continues down to finish the momentum. Hope that makes sense. :)

- lastly, I would soften the stop of the head going down at x75, it almost locks into place at the end.

You're very close!
JD

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Stefan Rei - Whiskey - Critique

video

The whiskey clip is looking really cool! I like the contrast that you have built into the poses and that you move back and forth in his stance, it makes good use of space.



Regarding your question: I wouldn't have him stay low after x150 and stare in his glass, only because I like the playful and comedic tone of the clip, but that's subjective. If you keep him down while he keeps staring at his glass, it will make for a more thoughtful moment. Your acting choice around x87 gives him a rather playful action, which I think works well with the audio...


... so what you have is nice to me, because he's slowly propping himself and getting ready for the last drink. It's a nice long subtle anticipation to his final move.
If he's staying in his pose like on x125, he would have to move quickly to get into the pose at 247, which might feel too big after the long, thoughtful look into his glass.
Unless you go the opposite way: so he's looking at his glass after x150, you keep him down, and instead of up and standing for the drink, you go lower and crouched, with a more downbeat feeling and less flamboyant drinking gesture, slowly slurping the last drop:




Hope that makes sense. :)

- you have a good amount of break downs, there's only one section that I'd work on a bit more timing wise, which is the head move from x215 to 216 and the drinking from x233 to 234. Given his drunken state, those moves will be sloppy and slower, with the faster move when he goes for the last drink. Is the audio longer? You might have to extend the shot a little bit to give those two moments enough time.

- if you're going with what you have, you could have him a little bit more wobbly at the end, where you push how far screen left he goes around x213, so that he can travel further screen right to get to x240, as a bigger anticipation, giving himself enough swing to make sure that he can get every last drop out of his glass.





Hope this helps!
JD