Lukas Niklaus - Bottles - Critique

Very nice, getting to the end stages!

- x39 to 52, watch both of his elbows, they both go down at the same time and give that section a bit of an IK arm feel to it, plus that arm movement does not affect his shoulders; if you scrub quickly back and forth you'll notice even more
- around x111, during his reaction, you could push his mouth shapes a bit more, maybe showing an exhale or even a mouthed word, in order to give face a bit more contrast during that emotional change
- the tip toe part works better, but I would reduce the root up/down a lot, so it's almost horizontal, for a more smooth and stealthy look

Those are the big moments to me that stood out the most that I would address first, especially the tip toe section. But that's about it for major changes.

Now you can get to the nitty gritty and polish, as you mentioned, arcs, spacing, etc. For instance, watch his right knee how it moves back quickly to x504, then kinda stays locked there for a frame and then moves forward again.
Arc wise it's moments like his left foot going screen left to x512 and then suddenly only down to x513, without finishing the SL arc it started.
Be aware of offscreen spacing too, like his right leg on x515 to 516, where it seems to move away from the root and extending the leg, yet on x517 it pops forward into frame, looking like a linear key.
The foot steps around that area also have a lot of flat foot plants and it would be cool to get more tilted foot poses in there, like you have on x48 for the SR foot.
Watch out for finger pose changes. Let's take his right hand holding the bottle, it never changes until after x315.
Lastly, I would do another pass on the arms, to really eliminate IK moments like the SR arm/hand after x78, especially after x81. The big sign is when the elbow is moving a lot yet the hand is almost unaffected by it translation wise, but especially rotation wise.

Jero Maggi - Sit Down - Critique

[question about what and why it's locking wrong from x43 on]
It's all moving together and with even timing, but it's good that you "see" that something is off. :)

Try this, scrub back and forth through the scene from x20 to 32 and you'll see how the body parts are moving separately, but when you scrub from x45 to 60, it looks like you just animated the root so that the whole upper body rotates up and back.

You will have to offset the chest and the head more. The head could look towards us. He could change his arm pose so that the chest rotates towards as well (less than the head). The head/chest/body movements also have to start and end at different times, to make it feel more organic.

One last thing, speaking of scrubbing from 20 to 32. If you look at the root, it's moving pretty horizontally from left to right:


Everything needs to move on an arc (even if the arc is very small). Now think about what the legs are doing to the hips and root.


Root is high because SL leg is straight up, pushing root up. As he transitions from left to right, the root will dip, but when he's on the right side, the SR leg will push the hip and therefore the root up again. My green curve is exaggerated, but that's the idea. And if it means straightening the SR leg a bit more at x29, then that's okay.


Hope that makes sense! :)

JD

Lukas Niklaus - Bottles - Critique

Let's start with a picky thing. :)

- track the spacing of the hand holding the bottle after x7. On x7 there's nothing, then it pops into frame x8, moves SR to x9, then a tiny back SL (or stuck in space) on x10. Then the bottle goes up until x13 and stays put in that pose and orientation until x20. It would be cool to have a little up rotation, so that he can actually pour all the liquid in his mouth. At this current level there would still be water (or whatever) left in the bottle. Plus with the first sip and then a little up move for really emptying the bottle you will give it a bit more variety and contrast. The pic below illustrates the water level. Hahahaha!


- the hand gesture to close/screw the bottle cap on feels a bit loose from x35 to 55. Would be cool to get a little gesture that shows off a cool "screwing" motion, fitting his relaxed character

- the SR arm feels a bit IK-ish from x74 to x92 (careful when elbow is moving a lot but wrist doesn't rotate as much), and then it feels like a linear key from x92 to 93 (mostly rotation)

What's a bit tricky with his head orientation around x85 is that we lose his pupils.

- watch out for x101, you're overextending his right arm

- love the facial expression (especially his mouth) on x207 on :)

The body drag on x211 looks good, just the right amount to break up the upper body but still keeping in stealthy and not too overanimated.

The tip toe part, starting from x238 feels a bit linear and pose to pose in places. Watch out how both feet go up from x238 on, then both arms go up at the same time. The SR hand stops after x247 on linear keys and stays stuck in space until x260.
The legs are getting close to being overextended around x252, but the SR one definitely pops on x260.
The SR leg moves forward on linear keys and after x263 I would add compression to the foot as the SL foot takes a step, since all the weight is then on the SR foot (needs to go down a bit).
SL knee pops into a bent pose from x263 to 264,
Etc. etc. you mentioned yourself that this part is rough, I'm just commenting on what I'm seeing, but I know you're aware of this.

The timing of when the bottles start moving works now.

The bounce on x343 could be even higher, but it's definitely better than before, less floaty.

- his head feels loose and bouncy from x423 to 460, there's a lot of side to side bobble. I would actually stiffen the head up a bit, since at that point he's a bit panicky and stressed, which would get reflected in his body.

- what do you think about milking the moment from x456 to 460 by adding a few frames. After all the action, you could slow that moment down like he's really trying to put it down slowly, so that it won't fall again. Kind of a Raiders moment:


His right arm falling down from x480 to 496 has a bit too much hand overlap for me (at x492). It gives it a relaxed feeling and again, he's not relaxed, he's stressed, so that feels a bit animated for animation's sake, but not staying within character. But I like all the other changes!

The exit works, the only picky thing would be to add one more tiny sliver of his head at x575. Right now you can see more than his half at x574, but then at 575 the head pops out. Even if that's the correct spacing, it still feels like a pop, so you'd have to adjust a few frames before that for a smoother exit. I know, picky. :)

Jero Maggi - Sit Down - Critique

This looks great! You pick up really quickly! :)

Here my thoughts:
- I wonder if you should rotate the head towards us a bit on x0 (for that pose) as he looks back, so it's not so 90 degree rotated
- around x48, when he's sitting down and has his hands on his legs, I would bring up his shoulders, so we can feel that he's propping his arms on his legs and therefore pushing the shoulders up a bit
- as you spline this, you can add a little overlap in the head after x50; his root comes to a stop and that sudden stop makes the head go down a bit (imagine walking and stopping quickly while keeping your head loose, it would bounce forward and down, finishing the forward momentum)
- moving on to spline, you can start thinking about finger poses so they get out of the generic x0 & x62 poses
- you might have to extend the shot a little bit, but maybe not; right now he leans back and you almost want to feel how the back hits the chair and stops and the head does a little overlap there

That's it though, looking great!

Mike Wilson - Candy - Critique

Hahaha, that's kinda funny too, I like that! Gives us the mystery of what the hell is so strong in this stroller!!
The only thing I would add is a hand holding the candy stick, so that when he pulls on it, around x350, the candy can move up and to the right a bit, showing us a bit more of the hand of the baby. What do you think?

For the guy:
- make sure that you have side to side tilts in the hip during the steps, for proper weight distribution, it kinda looks like they stay horizontal
- as you continue to put more breakdowns in and spline things out, make sure to avoid sticky frames like on his right hand, from x144 to 152, where the hand seems stuck in space
- on x187, you could bring his left arm further back, separating it from the body for a clean silhouette
- x201 feels a bit awkward pose wise with the screen left arm, it's very angular and feels almost broken and watch out for the arm around x206, perspective wise, the elbow is almost right behind the hand, which makes it look like a really short arm :)
- his left foot on x200 is on its heel, crossed over the left foot, but then he pivots off his toes on x202, then back on his heels at x205. Are you going for a little bounce during that turnaround which would give the feet room for those changes? What's the plan there?
- on x210 I would lean him forward, going screen left, a tiny bit, only to push the "curious" feel of it; he can then go back and stay the way he is on x246 for the antic and move to the left on x262 the way you have it; although, on x263, I'm not a bit fan of the straight arm and straight leg, it's a bit mirrored and angular and a more curved line of action would work better


- same thing later before he pulls the candy


Watch out for those straight lines. But again, I like the idea of not seeing the baby! :)

Jero Maggi - Sit Down - Critique

Hey, this is a great start, nicely done!!

Here my thoughts:
- first frame, love the arc going from the screen right (SR) foot up to the head; in that pose though, it looks like all the weight is on the screen left (SL) leg, which means that the hips would be up on the SL side


- once you're adding more breakdowns, watch out for the x7 to x8 section, it's a big move over one frame, so if you'd spline that now, it'd be way too fast; so as you continue to put in more break downs, slow that part down by a few frames
- as he's leaning over to the other leg on x8 though, the weight would shift over to the leg, so the hips would go up on the SR side





Think of it as the contrapposto pose:





- you might have to adjust the timing of how is sitting down, depending on what you're going for. Right now it looks like he's very careful about it, which is fine, if that's what you're going for. If it's a more regular sit down, the root might go down and accelerate a bit and plop into the chair; if you'd spline this, it would look a bit even; if I space out the root spacing going down, I get this:



As you can see, the red lines are pretty even.

- watch out for the upper body movement from x34 to 35, it's really big for over one frame and therefore pops up; add a few more frames in between those two poses to slow it down a bit

- for a little detail thing down the road, as you add more breakdowns and get into splined curves, think about adding complexity to little moves; again, nothing to worry about now, make sure that the main timing and weight is working correctly, this is just a sneak peak:
> from x7 to 8, the SR foot is in the same orientation, but you could have his left foot turned inward a bit more on x7:



Then on x8 and on, as he's rotating his body away from the chair (from his perspective he's turning to his right), the heel turns outward to the pose that you have on x8.
That's more polish stuff for down the line but you're already in such a good spot for your first animation of this type, that I'm confident you'll understand it as you progress.

Can't wait to see the updates!! Nice work Jero!

Cheers
JD

Lukas Niklaus - Bottles - Critique

(Answers to his German questions)

Betr. Des zu animiert wirkenden schrittes bei x61, da hatte ich eigentlich vor gehabt, dass er die flaschen erst im letzten moment sieht und deshalb eine art “erschrockenen” schritt nach SL macht. Habe deshalb diese Woche den Kopf neu getimed, und auch am gesicht gearbeitet. Ich hoffe man verstehts jetzt ein bisschen besser.

This part works better and makes more sense now, given your explanation. My observation is this: the whole move has its focus on the arm, which distracts from his emotional reaction. It also doesn't help that the arm is almost moving first, before his reaction to the bottles being piled up. From a technical point of view it also looks a bit IK, mostly due to the horizontal movements and the visual cue of arm moving independently from his body (one of those tricky IK things).
I think to make it super clear, you could stake out separate beats, so that his reaction and the sidestep don't flow together. You could have a little bigger facial take (nothing crazy, just amp it up a little bit more) and then the sidestep (again, nothing seconds apart, but just a little bit more separated).

In der ganzen region um x142 muss noch viel tightening arbeit getan werden. Das timing der augen etc. passt mir noch nicht ganz.

You're right, the eyes could need some work, but to me it's also the amount of time he takes to just stare at the bottles combined with how little the pupils are (more difficult for audience to stay connected with the character).

Von x185 bis x245 habe ich deinen Mr. Bean tip versucht rein zu nehmen. Mir passts... Ich hatte etwas angst dass es ev. Zu cartoony wird, aber ich finde es passt :-)
Technisch hinkts noch etwas hinterher. (besonders wenn er von den zehenspitzen nach SR geht. Muss da nochmal in die video ref rein schauen.) Aber lustigerweise war der prozess viel natürlicher obwohl ich nicht zurück in stepped gegangen bin... Wie du sagst, man sieht das timing sofort... Kommt gut. Und was mir ein besonders gutes gefühl gibt... Als ichs den playblast zum ersten mal angeschaut habe, hat mir mein eigener shot zum lächeln gebracht. Und nicht weils so aussah wie ich wollte, sondern weil ichs witzig fand.

Absolutely! I smiled as well! I think the acting choices are selling the moment a lot better. There's always the risk of going too broad and being cartoony, but like you said, I think you didn't go overboard.
And again, I agree with your tip toe comment. What if he takes tiny little steps on his tippy toes? Rhythm wise it might give you some contrast. Right now you have mostly big moves: big look SL, big step to SR, big stop, big getting-on-toes, big last step. So rhythm wise it feels a bit even with constant ups and downs. If you add quick little steps towards the end, it would break up the rhythm.
From x199 to 206, during that side step, I think you could delay the upper body a bit, so that it's not one vertical line throughout the body. It's a bit stiff.

Wenn die flaschen das erste mal fallen muss ich glaube ich bald mal noch das timing anpassen. Hatte da eine Rigid Body Sim gemacht, aber momentan rutschen sie zu langsam. Er reagiert bevor sie anfangen zu rutschen.
Werde die Keys so anpassen, dass wenigstens die flasche die er fängt etwas länger braucht.

I see what you mean and good idea. Style wise it will work with the guy, since he's a bit more animated now and you pushed the acting, you can give the bottles a more distinct style in their fall, so it's not so real time physics. I'm all for that but that's a pet peeve of mine. It always bugs me when the characters' timing is stylized, yet how the cloth and hair moves is photo real, same with fire, smoke, etc. :)
I do really like how he reacts to the bottle falling and how his right arm goes for the bottle. There's also a neat feeling of him not fully grabbing the bottle and how the bottle bounces off his hand, makes it feel light, plastic-y and empty. Since you're potentially pushing the timing, the bottle could bounce off his hand a TINY bit more? Around x301 it could be a bit higher?

Ein weiterer sorgenpunkt den ich bisher etwas vergessen habe ist um x410 wenn er die flasch in seiner hand dreht. Ich hatte das ausprobiert, und es ist möglich, aber irgendwie unnötig und ev. Etwas ablenkend? Was meinst du? Ich habe mir gedacht, da ich eh in die Flaschen Animation eingreife, könnte ich die Flasche schon ganz zu anfang um 180° drehen, damit er sie schon 180° gedreht fängt...

To be honest, in this version it doesn't look like he's turning the bottle, it feels more like a constraint pop. But to answer your question, I don't think it's needed, he can put the bottle back in the orientation that he's holding it when he picks it up.

Mit dem Ende bin ich auch noch nicht ganz zufrieden.
Den blick bei x442 sollte ich glaube ich noch etwas länger halten. Und auch danach könnte es glaube ich noch ein paar keyframes mehr vertragen.
Was hältst du vom ganzen? War etwas schwierig referenzmaterial zu filmen, da man wenn mans plant nicht so gestresst nach links schauen kann...
Ausserdem glaube ich der Fuss würde nicht vom Boden weg kommen... Jetzt da ichs mir anschaue, glaube ich es wäre gescheiter, mehr auf die beiden blicke zu vertrauen, diese richtig zu zeigen und damit die gestresste attitude zu vermitteln.

About the ending, I'm not too sure this is working right now. There's a feeling of things being disconnected, both timing wise and body mechanics wise.
When takes the step with his left leg after x435, it looks like his body goes up and a bit screen left to around x439, but then that's it. Even after the foot starts planting around x442, I don't feel like his body continues the screen left momentum that you initiated, so there's no weight shift and correct weight distribution. Additionally on that x442, the head is twisted pretty far to the right, so while all the movement is going screen left with the body, you have the head stuck in that pose and moving independently (despite the head turn it doesn't feel like the neck nor the upper chest is affected by that head turn).
Also, looks at his right shoulder and upper chest rotation from x435 to 442, it's always in the same position, so that whole section feels a bit disconnected from the rest.
Watch out for his right arm, how it moves forward in space from x455 to 460, which also feels a bit disconnected from the rest of the body.
Give the body enough frames for the proper weight shifts, so when you have the root moving screen right from x447 to 450, it already starts moving screen left right after, even though the foot is fully planted at x452. Despite the cartoony aspect, you still have to consider the correct body mechanics, so when you move the body to the right, it will take the right leg a few frames to push against that screen right momentum so that it can change direction. Of course that timing can be pushed depending on the style, but your animation is not super stylized and a bit more within the cartoony/realism world, so I would have the body start moving screen left at x452/453 once the foot is planted and able to push.
I agree that the right foot being in the air around x463 feels awkward. You could keep it, but then I would push the pose more. Right now, at x463, the body is facing toward the wall in front of him, the left foot is pointed to the left, the upper chest feels like it's pointed a bit more to the left than straight forward, given the shoulder poses, yet the right leg is going to right?
If you bring the body a bit more to his right, so that it looks like he's about to take the step to his right, that would help (see super awesome green scribble), leading into a pose that's pushed even more (not holding that pose, that would go into Warner Brother's land), which would be there as breakdowns for a tiny bit of a faster exit?



What do you think? Right now it feels a bit timid timing timing wise and the poses could be pushed a tiny bit more.

I hope any of this makes sense... :)

JD