Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Annie Guo - Light - Critique


The shot is quite long. You might be stretching the patience of people watching this. You could cut it up into different camera angles maybe. But that was my first impression, that it was long.
I like the beginning though, how he stretches in and then crawls towards the lamp. Where it gets a bit funky is when the lamp lid comes off and he leans back and the lid rotates around. It gets a bit messy. First the lid moves before the hands/arms are moving on x354 to 355. Then the body shoots back and the lid as well, but the lid kinda moves independently from the hands, you don't feel like the hands are actually pulling the lid off. After x360 the lid stops traveling to the left and goes to the right until x365, then spins around with the pivot at the top of the lid, then travels more to the right until x378. That whole section is a bit crazy. :)
Then on x453 he's doing something with his mouth and then the flame appears? What exactly is he doing there?
And overall the arms feel very IK-ish. You will have to really look at the arcs and the spacing to make sure that the arms are part of the body and not moving separately from it.


Monday, August 23, 2010

Barry Nardone - Winged Creature - Critique

About the clip:

in the first shot there's still that moment on x54 and on where both wings turn with the body for a few frames until around x70 and then stop. It would be good to separate their movement and not have them so in sync with the body either.
I would also keep the soldier's gun where it is around -x18 in terms of height. Right now after -18 it slowly drifts up to around x40. The new re-grip after that also feels a bit slow. I would take out that drift and speed up that re-grip.
There's also something odd about that head turn ending on around -x38. It speeds up and then stops pretty quickly yet there is a moving hold to it. The combination of all that feels a bit funky. Maybe it's also accentuated by the fact that the gun is moving a bit faster during the head turn as well. It's as if the head turns quickly and then there's overlap with the gun. I would first only tweak the head and work on that stop.
The blink after the head turn feels a bit mechanical and even.

2nd shot:
when the hand of the creature moves and the fingers move out to x151, don't have them go back. Right now they go from A to B, then back to A pose wise. It feels too even, plus the fingers go out when the head turns, then there's a pause and then the head turns again and the fingers go back. It feels all too in sync, so I would lose the second finger part. You can sell the first finger movement as the creature putting weight on that hand and the fingers flattening out because of that.

Last shot:
watch the base of the wings. For example the screen right one at x190. It goes down as the 2nd half of the wing goes up but then stops at x194, then moves drastically down at x197. Smooth out that transition a bit.
The lift off still feels a bit funky. It gets off the ground very quickly and it would be neat to get more separation in the body. As the wings go up, the body could go down and then when the wings flap down it can pull the chest up. I would also smooth out how the body transitions into hangtime. You have the body speed up and then come to a quick slow down around x202.
The creature grabbing the guy is better but after around x265 still doesn't feel threatening enough. There is something casual about the continuing flight path and creature movement.

Hope that helps!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Barry Nardone - Winged Creature - Critique

Alrighty, here some more feedback.

Overall it's looking very cool, I don't have that much to add actually.

1st shot:
From x82 to -26 I feel like he's rotating the gun around through his wrist, which makes it feel a bit light. I would use the arm more than the wrist, like the way you have it towards the end of that shot.
Watch the screen right elbow, it drifts up yet there isn't that much movement in the gun nor the screen right wrist, which gives that arm a bit of an IK feel to it (only until x11 or so).
Right before the turn around x60 you could adjust the screen right fingers, kinda preparing for more of a grip since he's swinging around that big heavy weapon.
The first blink feels a tad fast. I know he's tense and alert, but there something off in that timing. It's a bit even in timing, with the down and up feeling very similar and the up could ease more into a stop.
Would be good to get more of an expression (mouth wise) in there for the next pass.

The creature looks good, my only comment would be to offset their rotation from the body with some drag and overlap from x57 to 71.

2nd shot:
The guy looks great. Only thing would be to tweak the timing of the 2nd swing screen right and maybe have him not go as far. It feels like the big swing at the end of the 1st shot is distance wise about the same as the 1st in this shot and the one back is about the same again. So overall a bit even, which could use a bit more contrast then. He could swing half way at the end, pause a bit, then continue the swing to the right.

The creature for the next could use some keep alive in that wrist, to feel the pressure as it shifts weight, with the palm compressing and fingers reacting to that. Not sure what's going on with the wrist at the beginning. It seems a bit stuck in space (except rotation) from x91 to around x103. Yet at the beginning is there a finger going through the ground geometry?

3rd shot:
The lift off feels a bit sharp, especially looking at the screen left front arm.
During the flap down to x202 it would be cool to have the wings fold all the way down (rotating at the base, not half way - if that makes sense). I think that would make it a bit more powerful. And as the wings flap down the body would go up a bit and react to that force. Right now the body just starts hovering up at x199.

I would wait with the camera pan until the creature breaks frame to the right a bit. Right now at x246 it feels like the camera operator is anticipating the action, instead of following it, by leaving enough room on the screen right side.

How it grabs the soldier could be a bit more complex and careful with the drag and overlap on the guy. From x246 to 247 the gun arm swings out over one frame. The body also gets just twisted by the creatures hand clockwise to x249, with no upper body and head drag.

The creature could feel a bit more threatening during the x264 and x300 section. It's mostly the legs that are just dangling which give me a more relaxed impression. Speaking of legs, the guy's legs are a bit stiff from x262 to 279 and from then on I would have them rotate down since the creature is flying up so that they drag more.

But again, cool sequence of shots, keep going!


Friday, August 13, 2010

Anthony Merola - ball bounce - Critique

The ball bounce off to the right is much much better, well done! My only picky observation would be:
- when an object enters or exits frame, you should try to have a little piece of the object visible on the first frame for the entry or last frame before the exit. So the first frame is x15 where we see the ball fully. It would be neat to have one frame before that we see only as much as what you have on x18. If you don't have it it feels like the ball just pops in
- frame the shot down so that we can see ball impact on x18 and 38
- x47 the ball should be on a path down, but you have the ball higher than on x46

But again, much much better!

The second clip has the same entry problem (seems to be the same clip?), with the poppy entry on x15.
The bounce off the wall is good, I think it just goes too far to the left afterwards. The momentum of the ball will decrease over the course of the shot. Look at where the ball is on x38. Once the ball will bounce off the wall it would not go as far again. So the position on x58 is too far screen left. Have it more to the right next to the frame counter.
Overall it's really good, but then on x74 on the ball gets suddenly pulled down over one frame and then it it rolls on the ground super fast until x78 and then suddenly slows down. That whole area needs another pass, matching the quality that you have before that section.

Keep going! Almost there, you're super close!


Akem Singh - Jump and run - Critique

HAHAHAHAHA! The run is awesome!

There little things I'd tweak for the run. From x5 to 6 the spacing screen right seems suddenly bigger than right before. Same from x11 to 12, etc. With that sudden acceleration and slower movement beforehand it gives the run a little sticky feel to it. It's like he's really trying to push off for the next step and then suddenly he gets let go. So make sure that the spacing is smoother.

Same thing goes for the jump. From x19 to 21 there's a certain amount of speed and then from x21 to 23 the spacing is suddenly very small and it slows down the movement quite a bit.

Right after the jump, from x25 to 26 the spacing is suddenly much bigger.

After the landing from x40 to 41 there's again a sudden spacing increase.

Overall make sure to smooth out the translation to the right so it's not so harsh in terms of changes.

The jump overall feels like he lifts off and is then being sucked over to the right. The movement is faster than the speed of the run.

It's a great first pass, you're already very close, nicely done!!


Michael Baran - Snowman - Feedback

The clip looks definitely better! I wouldn't change camera angles so late in the game since you're working on poses that work for this current camera. Breaking up the shot can be nice, but is not needed. If you break it up, you could add a close up when he stops rolling the ball and catches his breath, after that you can go back to the previous camera.

Animation wise it's coming together, but the arcs still feel a bit blocky, as if you keys on linear instead of spline. In terms of detail you'd have to work on finger poses (they stay mainly the same, especially during the very last pull/push). But before you get into that I would concentrate on the believability of the weight and the timing between poses.

Let's take for instance the first two pushes and then the segment where he steps away from the ball. Look at the timing and arcs of his arms. They kinda float up, then to the left then down. What I'm missing is a nice flow and rhythm of movements. Both arms move almost in sync. The root's movement also feels a bit blocky. Without contrast of movement and proper weight (like arms around x65 to x95) the animation tends to feel slow motion-y.

I would pick out separate sections, for instance the first push, then the 2nd push, walk backwards, side steps, etc. and work on those sections alone, separately, until it feels right. Shoot reference, act it out, time out how your arms swing and move. And try to act out exactly what you animated there. Try to pantomime your exact timing of animation and you'll notice areas that feel off.

Without specific timing the clip ends up being just about mechanics and the personality of a character is lost. The closest you get is during his pause where he wipes off his forehead and at the end during the finger taps.

I hope this makes sense...

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Barry Nardone - Winged Creature - Feedback

Overall it's very cool! Good mix of slow action and anticipation, with a nice action packed finish!
My thoughts on the shots individually.

1st shot:
I would have just the guy in frame, so we think "What's he up to?". Then the creature rises from behind the rocks so that our eyes go over there and we are introduced to what the guy is looking for. You can make it a badass evil rise and reveal.

2nd shot:
Can you compose it so that the human is visually in 2D space higher, so that he has less space in front of him? That way subconsciously we don't give him much room to see and it gives it a more caged in feel.

3rd shot:
I would slow down the camera pan while the creature is grabbing the guy. It's overall too fast, but I would actually linger on that moment, so you can see the cool moment of how the claws grab the guy, how he looks surprised, etc. all the gory details.

Again, super sweet idea. Nice way of show casing a little story, build up suspense, camera movement and of course complex animation.


Snehal Chaudhari - Ball with tail - Critique

Nice! Pretty much done, only little things left to fix!

- Your tail overlap needs another pass for the x12+ area. The tail needs to overlap and have a direction change.

- the tail stops moving up from x18 to x19, and after that you could push it a bit more up to x24, so that the tip is not pointed down anymore but up
- there are some funky poses from x43 to 44 and from 45 to 46, where the tail suddenly shoots up

- And watch your arc after the jump, around x44 on it starts to flatten out and it feels like the ball is traveling screen right too much, it gets floaty. The green arc is more the path that you should follow and which you started for the first half.

Almost there!


Friday, August 6, 2010

Krys Wada - Car parking - Critique

It's coming together really well!! Here my thoughts:

> First shot - I adjusted the twinning for elbow and eyebrows. I went
> with a subtle brow raise from the screen left guy as he turns.

Left guy:
I think the eyebrow raise is pretty good, but you could lift the screen right one a bit higher once you hit the pose on x65.
When he reads, I would dart his eyes a bit more from right to left and not have one continuous long shift. It feels a bit robotic. It gets also a bit weird when he turns his head from around x40 to x50 to the left. Since the eyes are going to the left but the head is faster it looks like the eyes are suddenly not moving.

Right guy:
At x78 he lifts his head up to around x85 but the eyes are drifting down? Not sure if they eye controller is too close, or if you lift the head up too much, it's just a weird moment when you have that much head movement but the eyes are moving the opposite way of the head movement.

> Second shot - I didn't dedicate as much time to but I did try to shake
> up the back and forths more. Slow ins and fast outs.

For the last movement forward I wouldn't move further than 429, so there's more contrast and you can get a little back and forth as a last quick funny move. I'd also start with the tires. Also, when the car breaks and stops, you could some forward tilt (just like the side to side tilt after the power slide/drift).

> Third shot - I improved on the driving. I feel really good about the
> changes I made. I also added some variation in the facial
> expressions.

The driving does feel really good with the guy. How he handles the wheel is nice! I would just have the car start a bit softer, it feels a bit linear how it starts moving. Have more of a gradual acceleration.
The passenger's book lift feels a bit even and slow, it could also settle a bit more, so it doesn't just stop.
The driver's eyes feel a bit weird. There's the same thing going on like in the previous shot where the head moves and the eyes move around in their socket (if that's a way to explain it). Especially when he shifts gears. The eyes also get wall eyed (too spread apart) around x748 and then they get back together, with the screen right on moving independently. Try to keep them more locked together.

> Fourth shot - I added in those missing frames. You were totally
> right! It was longer in the previous version.

Looks great!

> Fifth shot - I fixed the issues concerning the guy on the right.
> Moved his fist so that this pose is clearer and adjusted the lean over
> so their heads don't cross each other. I'm sorry about the confusion
> with the arm movements - they were supposed to be unbuckling seat
> belts. I added them in. I hope it reads well. The left guy is still
> floaty but I was trying to break up his movements so they didn't just
> all flow together.

When the driver does his fist move, it feels very IK-ish. Careful, try to avoid locking the fist in one direction while the arm bends around. Both hands do it actually during that part. They just move forward and backwards, but there's no major side to side and up/down, they are locked and move independently from their arms. Some of the pose transitions like the body lean right after the seat unbuckling feels too linear.

The passenger still feels floaty, like you said. But I like the general idea.

Nice work!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Michael Baran - Snowman - Critique


The pause works better, but I think you could still shave off 10 frames or so. Did you change the timing on the snowball resting before it falls? That feels a bit too long too. It could land on him around x460 already. Sorry if I didn't catch that before.

The dirt adds good stuff to it. Overall though he feels a bit even in timing. Nothing crazy, but a few zippier actions here and there for contrast would be good. For instance when he leans back for the puff around x99, he could accent that air blow with his head. Looking at it, it's probably more the arms that I'm reacting to (being even in timing), when he lets go off the ball at the begining around x70 and on. You don't have contrast, but there's just something even overall, hard to put my finger on it. But one thing that will help is to really track down your arcs. I think for the next version, I would do a limb pass and track arms, elbows, feet, knees, body of course, etc. and work in your arcs and get rid of pops.

Barry Nardone - Sure - Feedback

​Hey hey,

It's actually interesting to watch it without sound so you can concentrate on the visual changes and contrast (you do hit the right moments lipsync wise during the pauses and the breathing).

I understand the tone of the clip and the emotional continuity, but when I watched it the first time without sound (soooo sleepy... moving slowly - you should see me type :) ), I felt like the overall facial expression is pretty much the same through out. Look at the very beginning and the very end. Head down, eyes off to the side, head tilted away a bit, and the middle part is just a softer version of it. I do like how the body changes direction in the middle, that works well.

Maybe she could be insecure and timid at the beginning (like you have it) but afterwards she turns she's a bit more concentrated, probing and serious? It would work with the sound and would be emotionally and visually a bit more contrasty. Something so that the very first and very last frame feel different (especially facially).

Hope that makes sense...


Monday, August 2, 2010

Erik Lee - Goat - Feedback

That's some exotic looking goat! :)

I really like the idea! The only moment that stood out was the section during x90 and x110. I don't buy how the creature is pushing off and jumping up. I think it's just a matter of leaving the front legs no the edge of that rock so that they function as stabilizer and pushers. Keep them there up until around x100. So it's the legs that push off first, the front legs that keep the balance and start pushing at the end as well right as the back legs catch up.

I think that should work. Maybe do just a quick fix during that part before you continue?


Akem Singh - Sneak and jump - Critique

First the jump.

It has a nice feel to it!

I wouldn't go as far back as x3. Looking at that frame alone he'd fall backwards. If one of his feet was back there to push him forward again, then no problem. But as of now, it's a bit too far.

When he lunges forward, I would bring out his right leg earlier and stretch it forward a bit more, so that it's part of the jump. If you look at x10 to 17 for instance, the right leg is pretty much the same, save some rotation. But if you're not using it to lead the jump, then you might as well just do a regular jump with the body leading the action.

Overall though I feel that the arc is a bit flat. It feels like he's floating a bit to the right. If you bring him up higher than I can buy the distance. Unless he really leans forward.

The stop is a bit abrupt on x32, he swings back pretty fast and then stops. Especially given the distance, I would actually have him bounce a little bit further to the right with a little step.

Hahaha! The sneak is coming along very nicely! Little things:

- I would slow down how quickly the foot rotates up from x21 go x25 (and subsequent steps).

- the footroll is a bit early. You have it start right when the foot plants, like on x5. I'd actually have it go down up to x21 because he's applying pressure onto the foot in order to get up. Then, as he's moving the leg forward he's really trying to reach forward, so his back foot will roll up during that time.

- The side to side move (front view) could happen 3 or 4 frames earlier and end later. Right now it's a tad fast, which makes it a bit weird when he goes to the right and then stops so quickly. He's sneaking, on his toes, so he won't have that much muscle power to quickly stop his body. So I would soften that part a bit.

Little things! Almost done!!!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Eric Chiu - Creature run - Critique

Alright, about the shots!

What stands out a bit in the first shot is the section right after x243. His forward momentum slows down dramatically. It doesn't feel like the object slowed him down though. If you're running into something that fast, then your body will squash and compress given that you're into something. The momentum still has to go somewhere, even if there's an obstacle stopping you. Imagine a water balloon being thrown into a wall. Well, it hits it and stops, but it starts to squash and expand. The forward movement doesn't just stop.

You can continue with the individual movements that you have, like how he's coming down to x253, but overall he should be positioned closer to that dividing line. But in order to sell the impact you could lower the head less and then over two or so frames bring it down to what you have on x241, so that it squishes the creature together as well before it pushes the block away.

Smooth out the jump transition no x197 a bit more. On that frame to 198 you can see in the spacing the sudden speed increase.

The 2nd shot is clear and cuts well with the first one. But I would push it once you start polishing it. For instance, the roar has the mouth just opening in one axis, you can tilt the head sideways. You can also add some high frequency jitter in the head, to sell the tension and ferocity. Can you animate the ears? What about eye lids? Anything to push a pose change detail wise.

I would also make that first leg lift sharper by a few frames. It's a bit soft and takes away from the just previously shown anger when it roars.

Sweet shot! Keep going!