Monday, July 5, 2010
Erik Lee - Fight - Critique
- I should have mentioned that earlier, sorry... The girl, when she moves her arms up and her torso a bit to the left, watch her root and hips, they are totally locked. So have them follow that rotation and adjust her posing so it doesn't feel so separate.
- nitpicky detail: when she moves her eyes screen right, you could adjust the brows a bit. Maybe the screen right brow goes up a bit more and the left just a tiny bit up. Same with the mouth, maybe a little clench or the mouth is a bit open at the beginning (just a bit), then as she darts to her left, the mouth closes.
And I would move her even more to the right as she exits the frame. On x57 she's still really close to the camera. Then x58 the ear is massive! :)
- her screen right hand on x66 is good but then on x67, after such a big move down, how about the wrist is rotated up, so the hand really drags. It might get too flowy, but it could also make her a bit more graceful. Same with the screen left hand on x67, it could drag a bit more towards the point where the hand just was.
I would have to see a ground plane in order to judge if her hand is planted correctly around the x76 area.
There's something weird with the far right creature falling. For instance the foot at x86 just goes straight down until x89. It doesn't look like you're finishing the arc. Same with the root. Look at his screen right butt cheek on x77, then 78 and 79, it's moving in a horizontal line, then on x80 and on it moves pretty straight down. So finish the arc there as well.
- the girl landing is still a bit off spacing wise. Watch x158 to 160. The spacing is pretty big, then from x160 to 161 it's a bit smaller, which is okay, but on x162 she goes suddenly up and even less to the right, then on x163 almost nothing to the right, still up, then on x164 suddenly down. Those changes could get softened.
Watch her root from x173 to 174, it feels like she's slowing down the downward move, but the foot hasn't planted yet to push so that she would actually slow down. So delay that slowing down by 2 frames at least. In the same vein, I would also delay how she brings up her body around the x196 area, so that it's more in line with her right leg stabilizing herself and allowing her to move her body up.
Sorry for the wait, 4th of July craziness delayed the critique!
Hope it helps though!