Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Wini Wang - Jump - Critique

video

That's a fun jump!

Here my thoughts!

I need a frame counter. :)
I'll use the quicktime one which starts at frame 0.

- x8 to 9 the foot roll happens too quickly. I would start it softer and at x6 (flat tangent)
- I would bring up his/her right leg in one continuous motion; right now it shoots up to x11, then down to x13, then up again up to x17. I would have it go up from the beginning so that you can feel how swinging that leg up is helping with the jump momentum
- on x12, with the right leg going up, I would rotate the ball up (sideways), so that you get the "hip" in there
- the left leg goes up to x16, then pretty much stops the up movement and goes mostly screen right, keep going with that arc, don't flatten it; it dips from x17 to 18, then back up to x19; so overall, track your spacing and arcs
- on the landing, the left leg has a little move from x23 to 24, but then a quick slap down to x25; I would take out that little move to x24 and make it less snappy
- right leg snaps into overstretched pose from x19 to 20. Smooth out that transition
- x22 the "hips" are straight again, I would rotate it up (left side)
- feet could be tilted sideways during certain poses, like x22, so that this rotation is not untouched and default

Cheers
JD

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Wini Wang - Jump - Critique

video

Hey,

that looks really great! Nice work!

My thoughts and picky notes, since it's so good. :)

- x24, hips, the left side could be lower and his right side higher since that leg is swinging up

- x25, I feel like the body could be rotated back a tiny bit more (looking at the right edge of the lower body up to the upper body, it's quite a straight line, so getting a bit more of a C curve in it would be good)

- picky note: x33, right foot, could be tilted sideways so it's not landing flat

- if possible, have a little downward move in his left leg from around x33 to 37; with him landing the downward momentum would go through his left leg which is just dangling/hanging there throughout those frames)

- could just be me, but I would rotate the forearm a bit up on x36 so that his right arm is not swinging in such a straight line

- the upper body rotates forward too quickly from x43 to 44 (compared to the spacing on x42 to 43); the head could also drag a bit more; right now the whole body and head move as one unit down from x43 to 48, so breaking up the body from the head and rotating the chest back on that down move will help with the drag

- I would move down his left arm from x44 to 47 then back to what you have on x51; when he lands the downward momentum would carry on through his arms a little bit for some overlap

- the head pops forward on x59 to 60 and 61, then stops, then again a quick move forward to x68; in real time the head feels a bit poppy; if you could smooth that part out a bit it would help

- x73, left leg, a tiny bit bent, so that x74 is the straight leg frame (it pops a little bit into that straight pose)

- the upper body and head move in one unit back from x92 to 96 and then the back move stops; I would drag the head a tiny bit and rotate the chest a bit forward during that move and smooth out the stop

- the head could also lead the action from x97 down to x102 and on to 108

- the right upper arm could be rotated higher on x106 so it doesn't look like the arm is horizontal

- smooth out the arc and spacing of the left arm: it swings up to x105, but then goes forward to 106; you could take out the pose on x105 and not go further than 106

- right foot could rotate down from x103 to 104 so that the foot doesn't stay in the same rotation angle during the lift off

- the body has a super quick exit from x107 to 108, which feels like a pop; give the body at least one more frame where we can see the lower body

Almost there, keep going!
Cheers

JD

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Wini Wang - Jump - Critique

video

That looks really nice!

Picky notes:
- x14 the left foot goes up but there's not enough weight change. I know it's a fast move, but it would still be good to get a little bit of a hip rotation and root translate in there so that the leg raise doesn't feel so separate.
- I would keep the left leg extended on x30 as well and then start bending it for a nicer full extension pose
- involve the hips throughout; for instance, x33, the hips need to rotate forward in Y and up a bit, so that you can see how the right leg pulls it up and forward
- I would add a little root roll on x40 for the right leg
- extend the right leg a tiny bit on x43 so you don't just have one frame of leg extension for the push off
- left leg arc is flattened after x43; space out the left foot from x43 to 45, then from 46 to 48, the arc suddenly stops and the foot just goes down in that 2nd section.
- left foot would be flat on x49; after a jump and all that weight I would have a two frame plant
- from x55 to 56 I would rotate the foot down, so that the toes are not in a horizontal pose on x56; they are flat from x55 to 59, so that hop feels weird with the toe orientation not changing
- ease into the full extension on x65, the leg is bent and then pops into a straight and then stays locked
- leg and root move at the same time on x83, I would start the leg earlier than have the root move down (ease out of that more)
- keep the root a bit more screen right around x88; it looks like he's sitting down, so it's borderline off balance to the back
- I would have the left leg a TINY bit bent on x97, then straight on x98, the a little bit bent on x99
- reduce the foot rotation, it's bit pop from x98 to 99
- watch the spacing on the foot from x99 to x101, how it goes mostly up, but then from x101 to 102 it's more to the right than up, then from x102 to 103 it's a big jump to the right; overall work on that arc and the spacing

Picky picky but it's already looking great!