Saturday, March 3, 2012

Lukas Niklaus - Bottles - Critique

video

Let's start with a picky thing. :)

- track the spacing of the hand holding the bottle after x7. On x7 there's nothing, then it pops into frame x8, moves SR to x9, then a tiny back SL (or stuck in space) on x10. Then the bottle goes up until x13 and stays put in that pose and orientation until x20. It would be cool to have a little up rotation, so that he can actually pour all the liquid in his mouth. At this current level there would still be water (or whatever) left in the bottle. Plus with the first sip and then a little up move for really emptying the bottle you will give it a bit more variety and contrast. The pic below illustrates the water level. Hahahaha!


- the hand gesture to close/screw the bottle cap on feels a bit loose from x35 to 55. Would be cool to get a little gesture that shows off a cool "screwing" motion, fitting his relaxed character

- the SR arm feels a bit IK-ish from x74 to x92 (careful when elbow is moving a lot but wrist doesn't rotate as much), and then it feels like a linear key from x92 to 93 (mostly rotation)

What's a bit tricky with his head orientation around x85 is that we lose his pupils.

- watch out for x101, you're overextending his right arm

- love the facial expression (especially his mouth) on x207 on :)

The body drag on x211 looks good, just the right amount to break up the upper body but still keeping in stealthy and not too overanimated.

The tip toe part, starting from x238 feels a bit linear and pose to pose in places. Watch out how both feet go up from x238 on, then both arms go up at the same time. The SR hand stops after x247 on linear keys and stays stuck in space until x260.
The legs are getting close to being overextended around x252, but the SR one definitely pops on x260.
The SR leg moves forward on linear keys and after x263 I would add compression to the foot as the SL foot takes a step, since all the weight is then on the SR foot (needs to go down a bit).
SL knee pops into a bent pose from x263 to 264,
Etc. etc. you mentioned yourself that this part is rough, I'm just commenting on what I'm seeing, but I know you're aware of this.

The timing of when the bottles start moving works now.

The bounce on x343 could be even higher, but it's definitely better than before, less floaty.

- his head feels loose and bouncy from x423 to 460, there's a lot of side to side bobble. I would actually stiffen the head up a bit, since at that point he's a bit panicky and stressed, which would get reflected in his body.

- what do you think about milking the moment from x456 to 460 by adding a few frames. After all the action, you could slow that moment down like he's really trying to put it down slowly, so that it won't fall again. Kind of a Raiders moment:


His right arm falling down from x480 to 496 has a bit too much hand overlap for me (at x492). It gives it a relaxed feeling and again, he's not relaxed, he's stressed, so that feels a bit animated for animation's sake, but not staying within character. But I like all the other changes!

The exit works, the only picky thing would be to add one more tiny sliver of his head at x575. Right now you can see more than his half at x574, but then at 575 the head pops out. Even if that's the correct spacing, it still feels like a pop, so you'd have to adjust a few frames before that for a smoother exit. I know, picky. :)

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