Jessica Gamio - Marry - Feedback

I think that's headed in the right direction, there are only a few tweaks I would do. I like how forceful she is but for contrast I would keep the guy more calm. I don't think he would throw the case down because it's a bit aggressive and even angry. But for him to say "Does that matter?" means that he's very sure of himself, he's very confident. I think he would just put that case onto a side table or something (or casually put it back into his pocket (jacket or pants).

Same goes for the walk out. It's a bit fast. I would slow it all down so that the door closing would happen at x298. Make him controlled, he's in control of himself, he's calm, because he's so arrogant and sure of himself, vs. her, who feels defeated and powerless (she may rebel against his advances, but she might know deep down that he's stronger, which you could show in her facial expression towards the end. As he walks away her angry and stern face turns into something more sad and defeated).

What do you think?

JD

Bruno Andrade - Robot fight - Feedback

The animatic is a tricky thing. On one hand I really like it! The sequence is cool, the cameras are cool and the overall feel is great. On the other hand, looking at it purely from an animation point of view in terms of showing off skills for a reel, most shots won't have that much in them. The first one he's just standing there, same with the second one (which has an awesome reveal), the jump shot is a bit simple and short, the robot waiting won't have that much in it, the fall towards camera won't have much, the stab-jump-land could be a bit more complex and have the most potential.

It might be a good idea to continue the fight with the scorpion (it could grab it by the tail and spin it around for a throw; the action of grabbing, pulling the scorpion into a swing, all that momentum stuff could show off great weight). Then you have more meaty reel stuff, but as a whole, you could still finish the whole thing so that you have a sweet sequence with beginning and end.

Sometimes people put reel only shots at the front, then after the credits put the whole thing on it in case they want to see everything. You can polish out the shots and they won't hurt you anim wise (they're just not complex enough for the main reel) but then people can see how you put a story together with cameras and cuts.

Alon Helman - Sitting - Critique

Hey,

that's already looking nice, the drop of the root feels really good. The legs are on the right track, I would keep going with that. What stands out to me right now in this version is the head/neck area during the hit and the recoil of the spine.

The turnaround-looking-back-move feels a bit linear both in timing and in how the flat the arc, so watch out out for that part on your next pass.

Alright, the two main points:

- if you follow the spacing of the head it moves down pretty quickly as he sits down but from x50 to 51 it's stuck in space; I like the drag you have as the spine goes to the right but I would keep the momentum going with the head, so that the spacing from x49 to 50, 51 etc. gradually diminishes for a softer ease in as opposed to that quick stop you have now
- same quick spacing/timing stop happens from x60 to 61 with the spine; you will have to continue the forward move a bit longer and give it more hang time, so that the 2nd hit on the back piece of chair happens maybe around x75, as opposed to x64 that you have now
- look at the back of the head from lets say x56 to 60. Look at how it changes direction very quickly with no drag from x60 to 61. You will have to loosen up the head and neck anim so that there's a bit of drag in the head
- this might just be me, but with a chair that has wheels like that, I would have it roll screen right a bit more; unless it's some thick carpet :)

Looking good, keep going!
Cheers
JD

Ji-Hong Kim - Wife - Critique

Let's look at the "wife" clip!

It's overall already very cool, I just have little notes here and there.

1st shot
Right guy with glass:

- the arm that holds and lifts the glass feels a bit IK-ish. The first move up is a bit linear and even in terms of timing and the arc. I would slow it down at the beginning and ramp up and give it more of an under arc (like a reverse C); it also stops too quickly in Y around x28, as you move it up, I would soften that stop; same thing at the very end around x46; another IK sign is around x35 to x41. The elbow goes down while the rotation of the wrist is not affected at all. Sure he wants to keep the glass level, but whenever the wrist is locked in its rotation, while the arm and body move around, it's going to feel like an IK arm
- to me the head tilt around x42 is a bit fast, you could soften that beginning a bit as well

Left guy feels fine

2nd shot
The girl:

- the first couple frames have no animation on her and then she kinda pops into the movement. Have some keep alive at the beginning and smooth out that transition. I would also add a little bit more of a moving hold on the arm that holds the glass, and the screen right hand that waves, add some movement to the arm as she waves; right now that wrist feels very separate and isolated in its movement

The guy is fine

3rd shot
Right guy:

- the body, arm and head all move at the same time from x75 to 76; offset those actions a bit; ease out of that a bit more as well; if you look at the spacing of the head as it tilt screen left it feels like a linear key
- track the tip of the nose from x87 to 94; the move is pretty linear, there's not much of an arc to it and it stops a bit quickly too; you can soften that by properly finishing the arc with a little overshoot of ease in
- the glass holding arm will need that IK fix as well of; it will help to reduce elbow movement
- on the elbow check he gives to his friend, you start it at x75 with an anticipation, but watch out how linear the arcs are, it looks like another IK arm. I would also adjust the finger poses. They could relax a bit during the antic and get into more of a fist during the jab and then adjust again once he puts his hand on the counter
- the jab contact seems to be on x79/80, but the reaction of the guy happens only around x84. It's okay for him MENTALLY to react delayed, but PHYSICALLY you will have to show how the elbow moves the body of the guy right when it hits
- I think you could have a little eye brow accent on "Tom" and a bit more of a O mouth shape. Right now the upper lip feels a bit stuck in the same pose; I would also lower the brows a bit more during the shoulder grab; not into something angry, but just a bit more of a pose change, so that they can go up around x250 where he looks at him and starts laughing
- when his friend grabs him on the shoulder, I would close his glass holding fingers a bit more; right now it's more like secondary reaction but by closing them a bit more so it looks like he's making sure that he's holding his glass safely, it will look more like a voluntary action
- this one is purely subjective and maybe you can just try it out quickly to see the difference, but when he says "wife" you could have the hand that holds the glass go up a bit faster, adding a bit more emphasis to "wife"; I like what you have with his eyes, so maybe the glass is too much, but you never know
- when the friend takes his hand off his shoulder after x280 you have to show how that weight/pressure change of letting that shoulder go affects the shoulder and upper body

Left guy:

- I love how he goes for the bottle after he wakes up! :)
- the main thing would be to really solidify and strengthen the contact between his hand and the other guy's shoulder from x224 to x280; the hand is swimming around at the moment
- the other big thing to me is the lip sync and how there is so much detail in the audio and how it's not really showing on the guy; for instance: after x199 you close the mouth but in the audio you can still here the oooh-ohhh; the "haha" feels a bit late; the "maaaaan" and "hahaha" after that feel too simplified as well. That "maaaaan" could also have a bit more facially with a bit more of change throughout, where at the beginning the expression is a bit wider and stronger and fading out towards the end of the "maaaaaan"
- super picky note: the bottle holding wrist sticks in the air from x241 to 242 and then starts a rotation to 243, which looks like it's from a linear key; you could ease out of that more

4th shot:

- my only comments would be the silhouette around the legs and the overall balance. If you squint it looks like they only have three legs combined; I think you could separate them out a bit more, where her pose is a bit stronger than his, since she's in control and he's surprised; on her, it looks like her screen left foot is barely on the ground, but the weight feels a bit too far back where that foot would need a bit more contact with the ground for support. I would move her (and his) root a bit more screen right and curve her more to the right for a stronger C shape, so that she's really leaning into him

5th shot:
Right guy:

- the right guy is pretty good, I would just tweak the screen right arm and move it out a bit more, so that the glass edge and his thumb are not so lined up with his upper arm forming a tangent; it will give you a clearer silhouette by moving the arm to the right a bit

Left guy:

- his beer bottle hand feels a bit slow and IK-ish during the x325 to 343 area. From x325 to 327 the elbow moves but the wrist sticks in space, then the hand goes up but from x330 to around 334 the elbow goes down while the orientation of the wrist stays the same, having that locked IK-wrist feeling again; the overall timing of that up movement of the hand feels slow and even; from x356 to around 361 the move feels to flat, there's not enough of an arc in it
- the rest works and I love his expression during " what she say?" part

Nice work!!
Cheers
JD

Richard Clark - Drunk - Critique

Hey,

that's great, nice tweaks, I like how it's all coming together!

A few general comments first:

- make sure that the silhouette is clear, so for instance, at the beginning, the blue guy's hand is a bit lost in front of his body at x983, plus the key tip almost touches his left hand; x1007 on the other hand is nice and clear; around x1066, the key is kinda hidden, lost between the car edges of the back, plus the hand forms a tangent with another line of the car. I would lower the hand a bit so the hand is in front of the lighter car shape above the back tire (see image). Same around x1092, the key is overlapping with the red body and I would keep that clearer as well. Another one would be around x1130, where you could separate the legs and non-key arm a bit. The head/arm/body parts feel lumped together visually. Last one would be when he raises the key. The only clear part is the hand and the key, but the rest of the arm disappears in front of the body. It doesn't help that the whole character is blue. But you could tweak the pose so that the arm shape is clearer.
- red guy silhouette on x963 could be clearer for his arms. His right wrist gets lost in front of the left arm

From a technical point of view:

- it feels like the blue guy has IK arms; make sure that there isn't too much body/elbow movement while the wrist stays still. You will also want to make sure that there are arcs in your arm movements. Since it's not FK, IK arms tend to move around in a linear way. Good example would be when the blue guy raises his arm with the key at the end. It basically goes just straight up. The timing is also even. You will want to put a bit more character in that arm movement. Is he defeated when he brings that arm up? Is he doing it quickly to signal "Hurry! I need to get home!" Etc.
- I think the red guy hits the car a bit strongly at x1080; is that the intention, that he really jumps in front of the blue guy? If yes, then the body stops a bit too quickly, I would soften it a bit, add a bit more recovery with maybe a little step and arms sliding on the car for the right balance

Other than that, the timing is great and the ideas are clear. As you mentioned, it's a first pass, so for your next pass, add more breakdowns and really finish the timing of each movement. As you go into splined keys, make sure that there are no sudden pops in your animation, which means your spacing is solid without sudden speed changes or stops.

Can't wait to see the ending!

Cheers
JD

Atle Hillmann - Car Crash - Critique

About which character you should work on, I would figure out the dog at the same time. The kid is leading the shot until the dog comes in, and you'll have to make it all work with the kid. Yes, you can mostly work on the kid first, just always double check with the dog. And the dog will be off screen until he comes in, right?

I like the way you end it now, it's a nice strong pose and build up to it too, great work!!

Silhouette wise, you're still in the same boat as before. On x138 the hand is in front of the kid's face and even on x146 it's still overlapping and forming a tangent between the hand line and the head line (on x193 the lines don't barely touch or overlap, so there are no tangents anymore). x205 has a muddy silhouette again.

In his pose around x225 after the dog runs through, I would open up his legs and not stay in the same pose. His right leg could be more stretched out. If you scrub through your scene now, the legs are always stuck in the same pose. It would be good for contrast to break them up after the dog attack, so you visually show through the pose using the whole body that there was a change and that the dog messed something up.

About the transition from blocking to spline, I would make sure that you have enough breakdowns before splining and in your case you will need more. Take for instance x83, 93 and x119. If you spline this you probably wont' have a nice arc going through that move and the timing will be pretty even. So by doing another pass with more breakdowns you want to solidify the timing of your actions. The spline conversion shouldn't really affect the anim too much.

Hope that makes sense!

Cheers
JD

Alon Helman - Walk - Critiquec

Hey,

much better! But it still looks like the feet are slowing down before they get off the ground.

The rest of the walk is super cool!!! Nice work!! Love the head anim.

If I'd be super picky, then in the sideview, it feels like you're doing some drag and overlap on the fingers, they feel a bit loose, but that's super subtle. The other thing would be how the arms stop swinging back after x26 until around x4. I think you could feather off a bit more so that the arm continues and stops in a more smooth transition.

But still, very nice work!

Atle Hillmann - Car Crash - Critique

Hey,

thanks for the clip! Good start! Let's get to your questions:

1. usually you do facial and finger stuff at the end. I usually block out major emotion changes into the blocking, only because I like to have everything ready in rough form. A lot of people don't touch the face until the very end and that's usually the norm. Same with fingers. I don't want default flat finger poses throughout the shot, so I just block out simple pose changes that will support the main poses, but nothing crazy.

2. About the camera. What you want to do is place the camera so that each action by the character is clearly captured. What you have works. You don't want to have the camera looking down from the ceiling for instance, unless it's a specific story point. So kinda low to the ground is a good default position.

One thing though, which would help me, is for you to include a frame counter in your render. I'm going to use the quicktime frame counter, which starts at 0 (which might not be the frame range in your shot, so you will have to do the math). I would also hide the nurbs controllers and the grid, so we just have geometry in the playblast. Thanks!!

Animation wise you're on the right track, there are few areas I would tweak though.

You want to make sure that the silhouette is clear and that each pose reads clearly. The kid on x110 looks like he's picking his nose. :)

You are also covering his face with the hand, which you'd want to avoid, so that the audience is able to read the kid's face and expression (unless it's a needed story point in your shot to cover his face of course).

The dog seems a bit big, is there a way to scale him down? I thought there was a node that allows you to do so. Just proportion and design wise, he looks like he'd be smaller compared to the kid.

You mention that the dog will jump over his lap. What is the exact action going to be? Is he just running/jumping past the kid, is he trying to snatch the toy out of his hands?

For the kid at the end, you might want to bring his face back to us, so we can clearly see the emotional changes. If you keep it all in profile, it won't read as clearly.

Hope that helps!
Cheers

JD

Oscar Gonzales Luna - Weight shift - Critique

Hey,

it's tough to understand the clumsy part, there isn't really anything that tells us this part. The flirting bit is a bit unclear but I do sense the show-off aspect of it. Let's look at the technique, but I can elaborate on the acting a bit.

In it's current state, he looks down, then up, and goes right into his more proud stance. What's missing is the thought process inside that character so we understand each beat. What would help for instance is a moment where he kinda snaps out of his sad trance, after around x184, where he would blink and look a bit left and right (mostly with his eyes, not moving his whole body) and then realizes that the camera is on him. You want to see that realization in his face BEFORE he moves into the poses on x198 and 219, which show him being more of a show off.

I'm not sure if that hip move from x262 to 282 is very successful. It's not very clear in terms of acting ideas, whereas the last weight shift after x283 fits more the "victoria's secret" intention you mentioned. Although it's still a bit weird in terms of character change, where he goes from a more masculine type from x218 to around x245, with the belly out and rubbing it, to a more feminine weight shift and model pose at the end. So character wise he feels a bit unfocused when you have him go through so many different emotions and characters, from sad, to excited, to proud, to show-off-y to sexy.

Animation wise, I would avoid moments of twinning, where both arms are moving at the same time with the same posing, like on x186 to 204 (at least the end posing of the arms is a bit offset, but overall they start moving at the same time and both arms seem to go through the same key rhythm).

Make sure that when one part of the body moves that it affects the rest of the body. So after x219, where the arm goes forward and the hand rubs the belly, that arm movement feels very disconnected. You'd have to involve more of the shoulder and a bit of the chest.

The steps and weight shift from x246 to x269 need a bit more work regarding balance. The foot starts to move after x246, so the weight will go from both legs supporting the body to one leg, since one leg is in the air (or should be, otherwise you have him ice skate around). So around x251, the screen left foot should be a bit off the ground and the body leaned over screen right, so that the screen right leg is supporting the weight. If the character has any hip controls, then you'd have to bring up the screen right hip as well, showing the weight distribution.

​Around x259 the body should move screen left (right now it's off balance to the right) since the screen right leg is moving. All the weight is on the screen left leg and the body needs to keep the balance working.

When you do the weight shift from x283 to around x294, the body doesn't move side to side, where the weight is over one leg and then over the other. Right now it looks like the body pivots from the middle and from there the chest and hip rotate to change the pose, which feels too static. The body has to translate over for the correct weight shift as well.

Let me know if you more questions!
Cheers

JD

Alon Helman - Walk cycle - Critique

Alrighty!

The cycle's already looking good! You mention that he could break the cycle and wave and I like that, it would add a nice little moment.

Animation wise, there only a few little spots that stood upon first viewing.
- I like the rhythm of the root up/down movement, there's good weight in that and how it translates into the head for the overlap
- The head feels a bit detached, as if it was IK. Is the neck stretching when the head goes up? You could also have some sideways tilt, it feels a bit locked vertically
- looking at the front view, the hips look like there's a little bit too much Y rotation in there
- watch out for finger intersections through the hips (screen right one, front view; and left one I think too); I would also add a little bit more of an arc to the swings of the arms (they can do a little figure 8 arc when seen from the top); right now they are a bit straight they way the swing back and forth
- could you lessen the knee pop form x16 to 17? And watch out for the other knee, which goes back until x27, then forward for one frame, but then back again to x1 and forward again on x2; in real time it looks a little bit wobbley
- The feet moving backwards feel uneven spacing wise; the moment the foot touches the ground to the moment where it lifts off there should be only two keys, with a linear curve from touch down to lift off. Right now the spacing distance changes and the screen right foot even slows down before it gets off the ground (watch for toe intersections around x4 with the ground); you could also tilt them a bit more sideways around x12 for instance (screen left foot, front view)
- I would also offset his eyebrows and lower the top eye lids a bit, he feels spaced out)

Hope that helps!
Cheers
JD