Sunday, May 27, 2012

Elena Dae - Jump - Critique

video


Hi,

alright, let's look at the detail work:

Overall it's looking great, I like the timing and all the beats. On a technical side, here my thoughts:



- during most of the clip, the knee area is popping a lot, meaning the legs overextend and then pop into a bent pose; it's happening more at the beginning, until he jumps but it still happens afterwards, like from x83 to 84, where the  leg is fully straight and then pops into quite the bent pose

- speaking of feet, make sure that the foot contact is solid and that the feet don't slide or wiggle; for instance his left foot from x84 to 85 is locked (which could use some push for weight, but let's first fix the sliding), but then from 85 to 86 it seems to pivot off the SL side, but it could be more fixed in the toe area, given how much weight is still on the foot; 87 to 88 the foot suddenly rotates in Y, but not pivot off the toe, but more the middle of the foot, then the rotation in Y suddenly stops and the foot is suddenly fully extended, it then pops SR, then on 91 stops moving SR but pivots again around the middle; the pivot changes from x95 to 103, etc. So all in all, I'd give it another foot pass, to really settle the weight, the pivot points, where is it locked, where is it moving, how's the spacing, any one-frame direction changes to smooth out, etc.

That to me was the biggest part, the lower body region with all foot and leg work.

But following very closely are his arms as well. They do feel poppy as well. So make sure that you check the spacing and arcs as well on those. For instance:

- both arms go down up to x5, but then they stop abruptly, they then remain there and start to wiggle a lot. I know it's from the leg movement and you want some ambient movement in the arms because they react to the legs and root, but it could get smoothed out a little bit.

- more smoothing needs to be done ease in/out wise for the arms; the SL one goes up and stops pretty quickly at x34; the SR one during that time has little stop and goes, but then goes up until x55 and suddenly changes direction to the right, etc.

- given the big size of the hands, make sure that you track their arcs and direction changes, like during this moment:



From x64 to 66 the orientation is pretty much the same as the arm goes up, but then it changes direction and rotates around, given it a flat arc feel

- once you smooth out the pops and soften the root through that a bit, other areas will look better, but for now, just pay attention to the head, as it moves up until x37. It feels like it's a linear key from x37 to 38 and it stops too abruptly. The root up and down is not helping that part, so there might be some back and forth between softening areas and continuing certain moves like the head one here, where you'll have to adjust the stops into smoother moving holds

- the head could have a bit more of a drag from x64 and on, as he jumps; right now the head is in the same rotation from x64 to 65 (up/down wise), looking therefore a bit stiff

- after the landing on x76 the head also seems to move SL and then SR, lock a bit, then SL, etc. which goes back to the whole spacing thing; make sure to really track the whole body, section by section for any wiggles, pops and sudden direction changes

Later one we can look for more foot contact detail and facial elements, but the above mentioned areas need to get fixed first.

Hope this helps!
JD

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