Friday, October 14, 2011

Edward Seager - Dog - Critique

video


​Yeah, that 210 body reaction is too fast (good eye).

And I'm not really feeling the end of the dog, sorry. Hmm... And given how much he exits frame at 218, I would move the camera screen right as the guy kneels down, so that the framing is more leaning towards the right overall. So on x218, the guy wouldn't be in the center, but one body width screen left (hope that makes sense).

For the dog, what if after the 360 he gets back to something like x187, but butt on the floor, wagging his tail, mouth open, tongue out, panting, happy face?

Let's go note by note:

shot1

- dog is done! Nice job!

​ - guy head rotation needs more pushing, so that on x26 he's less 3/4 with his face towards us, more more profile, to really break up the head from the body; it still feels a bit too much like one unit

- not sure if that was there before (if yes, sorry for not seeing that earlier), but there's a head/body pop in the middle. Look at his screen left nostril as a reference point starting at x23. It goes up and left until x25, but from x25 to 26 barely left and even less up, from 26 to 27 not left at all but only up and much bigger than from 25 to 26; 27 to 28 goes left again, yet 28 to 29 suddenly to the right; 30 to 31 it's not going up at all anymore but only down after that until x33 and from 33 to 34 it barely goes down anymore. So all that in real time gives it a poppy feel

- that's it!

shot2

-his left arm seems to move down and the wrist rotates up from around x57 on but comes to an abrupt one frame halt on x66, that needs some softening

- watch out for the screen left forearm, it starts to evenly rotate clockwise from x144 on until x169. Either give that more purposeful movement (so it's not so even and robotic) or take it out

- on "hat" the eyebrows still feel too high, I would lessen that by 50% again

- good job on the rest of the notes!

shot3

- I don't see the jaw out on "you"

- from x222 on the head and body are too in synce and moving as one unit, loosen that up by breaking up the head anim

- on x205, watch out for angular shapes like on the dog's front right paw. There should be an ankle adjust controller, so that you can smooth out that line so it doesn't look so broken

- the guy bringing down his arms with the hat looks better, but I would slow it down at the end. It's good how it ramps up, but then go slow again, otherwise it feels like he's slamming the hat onto the dog. :)

- nice job on the ankle ambient movement, that's great polish stuff!!

Getting better and better, good work!

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