Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Christoph Angehrn - Fight - Critique


glad to hear it was helpful!

Here some picky notes for you:

shot 1:
- staging wise, I'd move the green guy a bit over, so that the hand of the red guy is not covering him or forming a tangent:

For the fist, it's looking better, I would just give it a beat at the end with the fist closed. It feels like you're closing it and then there's immediately the cut. I think you want to rest on that fist a bit longer and give the audience enough time to read it.
And don't forget to do the same thing with the other fist (a bit off set of course, but it's a bit weird to have only one fist do all the acting). :)

shot 2:
- that one works a lot better, nicely done! His thought process is a lot clearer and I like the looks and pauses!
- my only comment would be at the end. It's as if you kept the motion but just changed the finger pose, meaning, they feel a bit disconnected. Having that finger pose indicates something smaller (since there's only one finger up), but yet you have a big hand waving motion. So to me they're fighting a bit. I'd tone the wave done and maybe just have the arm come up, finger up, and then do two little finger moves back? Something like that? Your call, but I think there's still room for a more distinct acting choice.


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