Hey,
This is looking pretty good, I like where you're going with this! And the order of things, what he does and when he picks things up works great.
My overall comment would be that you could speed the whole thing up. In quicktime I watched it twice as fast and it still worked. Sure, there were moments where pose changes popped because of the new speed, but overall, it still worked. That was my first impression, that it was a bit dragging overall.
The other thing was posing. As you continue you will have to make sure that the silhouette is always working:
So for instance, on that frame, you wouldn't have his arm aligned with the outline of the body and bleeding into the line of the leg. My horrible drawings are probably more confusing than helpful.
Also, watch out for poses like the above one, where he looks very relaxed and normal. I'd make sure to always have some back and shoulder strain. So, shoulder up and back arched back to emphasize that feeling.
There are also some cool moments which get almost lost, like here:
I like how he uses his foot to open the door, but that moment is very fast and silhouette wise we almost miss it. I'd take those details and key moments from the reference and push it, timing wise and pose wise so that they're more readable.
But again, it's a great start! You're on the right track!
JD
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